Wednesday, May 11, 2016

Radiation begins

Today is the day I have dreaded most since we formulated a plan with the team of Oncologists. Today is the day that Hank begins 5 weeks, and three days of radiation. Today is the day that the Radiologists must slowly begin killing the cells in Hanks nasal area... the day that his bones slowly become dead in this region of his body. It is what doctors might call a necessary evil. If we want to kill the cancer, we must also kill Hank's nose and surrounding structure.
It won't turn strange colors and fall off his face, it will simply remain there. The same size, same shape, as the rest of his face and head grows with his body. New soft tissue will grow in this region, but the bone will remain just as it is today. 
It breaks my heart. Not just the radiation, but the Chemo, and the thought of necessary future reconstructive surgeries. All of it. The loss of freedom in where, how, and who Hank can play with. Watching Hank slowly lose interest in many foods he used to enjoy... whether from loss of appetite or  a change in his palette. His fuzzy little head, sparsely flecked with fair hairs. His once bright eyes, now look constantly swollen and tired. His uncharacteristic moods and naps. Our once sturdy, Hank the Tank, is no longer bearing that hearty frame. 
As Hank begins radiation today, I fear his small body shrinking... from loss of appetite, from being sedated each morning, from potential blisters in his mouth, from the combination of radiation and chemo... it is heart wrenching having to take him to a "therapy" that seems wholy untherapeutic from the outside. 
Today, Hank receives two of these "therapies." He goes in for radiation around 10am in Irving, then back to Dallas for 8 hours of chemo at Children's... then back to Irving in the morning for radiation. Please pray for minimal side effect for Hank as he has to be sedated with every radiation treatment. I fear all the chemicals and medicines building up in his system the next couple of days. Please pray for rest for Hank and Taylor as they will likely have to stay over-night for Hank's chemo and then go directly to Irving in the morning upon release. Pray that the radiation center can get Hank's appointment time earlier in the morning than 9:15, since he is unable to eat or drink anything prior to the procedure... which means he begs for cereal (his obsession right now) from the time he wakes up to the time he is sedated. Please pray for Taylor and I, as we are constantly mourning during this long process of trying to heal Hank. But mostly... please just pray for complete healing for Hank. 

1 comment:

  1. Prayers for all of you Lindsey. May God wrap you in his arms and give you the comfort you need.